I must alwayz remember that I'm unique; just like everyone elze.

Do you take personality testz? The ones which provide you questionz and ask you to jot them down on a paper, while at the same time warning you not to jump to the end and finally when you have taken the whole of it provide you with half a dozen lines about you. Most of them ask you to write down names of two persons, one of the same sex and the other of the opposite one. And then in the end they declare that the one of your gender is your best friend and the other is one you are in love with.

Its no where written that you must love someone only of the opposite sex. And firstly, aint you in love with him, if he is your best friend. Many people behave the same. I cannot explain this to a living creature if he is unwilling to change directions.

I have fun while taking these tests.....And usually the two names are more or less constant. I dont know why but one of them is changin now-a-dayz. Its neither fortunate nor unfortunate. Then there are some more partz of it asking you questions that you need to ponder over a while and yet have to give the answer as instantaneously as possible. At the end of one of such testz this is what i waz provided with.

"You are very romantic but show feels that to love means to suffer. You wind up serving your mate & attracting people who have unusual trouble. You see yourself as a lover's savior. Have low self-esteem, and very picky. Artistic and like to fall in love, but you let your love pass by, by loving with your mind, not your heart. Rare to find! Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight for what they want. Extremely outgoing. Sexy as ........ Loves to help people in times of need. Outstanding kisser. Very funny. Awesome personality. Stubborn. Most caring person you will ever meet! One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most sexiest people on earth!

Most of these tests i take, i find what is written about me is true. I dont know if it really is or it is that you always feel it that way no matter whatever is written. This is one more thing that deserves to occupy my first topic, " one thing i dont know why? ". Somehow, i found out that everybody does not feel this way. But i do. Atleast its not that all these predictions are true for Taureanz who were born in second week of may.

I guess i dont have any answer to this question except that people with empathy can put themselves in all kinds of shoes and hence they can relate to all kinds of characteristics and circumstances , no matter how diverse they are.

One thing i dont know why?

To start with, the first thing i dont know why is the title of this blog.

It is really very beautiful to start just like the first page of my dairy.....the excitement that surrounds........ and the hype the heart creates to the other parts of the body........and the reflex actions of those parts.........an invisible chemical reaction takes place somewhere........fluids seem to displace.........somethings get heavier than they actually are.........somethings get lighter than they are supposed to be.......butterflies seem to flap their wings in your stomach........and an innate sense of fear that i may fail to complete what i have started........

I believe in me......i dont know whence this thought but yes, some thoughts are mind tearing, they kill you over that period just bcoz they cant be escaped without that......some on the other hand are alpenliebe's of little joys. They give you something so you could smile on it secretly or laugh it up before someone you are close with and then when asked why?, you can either tell him the little joy or lie effortlessly, as the situation demands.

Lies........one word i have to use with myself often enough that it has become a regular feature in the thoughtz. One thing i dont know why? why do i have to lie when it is not necessary, not in the least needed?, The truth in its place would have caused perhaps no difference to others but yet a sense of insecurity that will haunt you afterwards for having it said. A feel that somewhere someone is thinking of what you have just said and all of a sudden you are trying to figure out what the hell he is thinking. It will continue till it is interuppted by an external medium, need not be a human, could as well be a phone ringing or an animal passing by or just a decibel >30 sound. I am not against lies but i am against the trying to figure it out part of it.

Against is not the word. Many a times we dont find apt words for what we want to express, this results in the opposite person not being able to get what exactly you want him to get. This is not valid in the case of mainstream and grave discussions but during the informal ones where one single mistake committed by the listener will spoil what you actually wanted to continue saying.

Happy ending is what it requires for anything, even a curse to end successfully.